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What Are Ya’ll Up To After This Week’s Address To The Nation?

Wadau, najua sahii mko na furaha mbaya.

I know you know exactly what I’m talking about… Watu wa enjoyment hoyeeeeee! Your pleas have finally been met.

I saw joints were wasting no time in welcoming their patrons back and fo sho some of ya’ll were in those joints, sitajaja majina, chapaing a few. Ya’ll are really outchea taking advantage kabla kufungwe tena huh… In response to this on SM, it was the memes for me. Ya’ll are just too creative. Almost as creative as a certain TV station who have mastered the art of puns.

Me I’m just here happy juu curfew imesongezwa coz a dude was really struggling with that 9pm one. Hiyo ndio time story huwa zimeshika and you just don’t wanna leave your pals or your famo. Sasa at least tuko na ka allowance but be sure wengine wetu bado tutaskia kama 11pm is still early.

Lakini mliona ile crackdown on a certain joint on Thika road thanks to an expose by a certain influencer pale on the gram? I’m sure they’re wishing last week was this week but oh well, maji yakimwagika…

Mimi I just have so many questions though, coz you can’t be out in the club ama restaurant and have your mask on (na msiniite party pooper please. Hapa hatuna time ya makasiriko)…

What safety measures are they going to put in place? Temp check, sawa. Sanitize your hands, ermm, okay. Wear your masks? Tafadhali niambieni how this one will work. Juu already breathing in those things ukiwa solo is an uphill task, so how now will we do that in a place full of people? Also, eating and drinking… Alafuuu, will they be sanitizing the seats and common areas? Kama sometimes loos are a challenge to clean in some joints na disinfecting je?

Don’t get me wrong, pia mimi nataka kuhave fun. Nikuuliza tu. We’ve seen cases spike right back up in countries where strict measures were relaxed. And that just might happen here if we forget about all the measures we stuck to a few months ago. In March we were onnit. Kuogopa nayo. But ni kama we’ve become brave.

Alls I’m saying guys, as you go on rendezvous and enjoy this (seems like new) found freedom, mendelee kujichunga. Also, don’t forget to tap and go with your KCB Visa Card. Costs you zero bob, is 100% secure and earns you Simba Points every time you transact. On the plus side, I’m glad that businesses can now try and pick up the losses they have suffered for months.

Anweis, wacha tuone vile kutaenda these next few weeks. Party responsibly juu mimi nataka kwenda holiday soon na mkimisbehave tutafungiwa tena mapema kama kuku. Have a fantastic weekend guys.


Over & Out,

The Witty Banker.

Oct 02, 2020 Trending

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